Wednesday, December 25, 2013

The Gift Of Thought

Every idea does not come from somewhere deep and because of something important. Often times the greatest moments we experience are those of un-expectancy. I sat with fellow blogger and friend Brandon Ax and the idea came to him to write a song. He said it jokingly at first, as did I, because I write music when I feel anguish or excitement, and more times than not love.

This time was different though because nothing terrific or horrible was a precursor to the events that followed that innocent idea. It was silly in fact, to just sit and write as if some part of us were even capable. Granted I have written several songs and he as a writer himself showed the capability of doing so, but it always felt to me like when emotion charged the writing, I didn't feel responsible for the thoughts and words that fell from that moment, rather I was an assistant to my feelings, only doing the actual work of writing it down.

Emotions, whether good or bad act so often as triggers to the inert abilities we sometimes forget are in us. It seems effortless to tap into our own resources when emotion is involved, but as we found out over the course of about 3 hours, it is not emotion that creates the thoughts and desires within us, they only help to expel them when we normally would hold on to them selfishly. The truth is, we all have been gifted with thought, and whether or not we exercise it is up to us. It is easier to do when triggered by an event, but the gift is there waiting regardless so you might as well use it. You never know who could be waiting to hear the exact thing your thinking. Hope you enjoy. Thanks

Monday, December 23, 2013


     Bad Dog!!!  We've all said it at one point or anther to our beloved pooches, unless you don't own a dog, in which case I have one thing to say....GET A DOG!!!  They are great.  Seriously though, you've at least heard someone say it.  In fact it's probably the most common phrase directed towards canines next to "good dog".  I have used the phrase many times myself.  It dawned on me though that maybe my dog understood what I was saying.  I mean I would certainly hope that she did, after all I am speaking to her as if she does, expecting her to listen and to be obedient. 

     One day when I uttered the phrase, Bad Dog, she lowered her head in shame and pouted.  I couldn't help but to reevaluate what it was I was actually saying to her.  The precursor to her scolding was really not that big of a deal.  She got excited and knocked a glass from the table next to my couch.  I reflexively barked at her with those two words that no dog wants to hear.  I didn't tell her she did something wrong, didn't show my dog her mistake, nope, I just flat out told her, you are a bad dog

     Imagine if you made a mistake at work and someone came to you and said, you are a bad person.  I mean that's really harsh to be told you are not a good person because you made a mistake.  I know that dogs don't think like we do and they operate on a different level than humans, but its something to consider.  If you think your dog understands what your saying, maybe it's not the best way to say it.

The conception of TWIG

      Feb. the 2nd in Nashville, TN I will be auditioning for the Voice.  I have been in love with music since I was very small and my dad always had me in a studio doing his recordings.  I fell in love with what music could do.  I have always had a heart for others and music is not limited to one type of person.  It is a universal medicine that can instantly change the atmosphere of a room.  So when February arrives and I stand in front of the producers and sing, it will be an expected journey.  I will be excited and nervous of course, but it is something I sought after for a while. 

     Writing on the other hand, at least writing books, was completely unexpected.  I never thought about doing it, and it never once crossed my mind as something I'd be good at or would enjoy.  Honestly it was a simple thought, one that wasn't miraculous or brilliant, that drove me to write.  I thought out loud one day, 'Hey, there should be a book about a stick that falls out of his family tree.'  I know, just a simple play on words that a child could have thought up, and at first that's all that I made of it.  Something strange happened though and I'll never understand why.  As I was working as a forklift driver in Charlotte, NC I found myself thinking about this silly little stick.  Something about it just would not go away.

     As I pushed it to the back of my mind several more times, it always reemerged.  I only had the one thought, not a complete story and I belittled the idea by saying it was silly.  That is until me and my wife went to an adoption agency.  She was unable to carry a child for me and adoption seemed like the perfect fit.  It was in that office, discussing the number of children that needed a family, that my heart broke for those children.  Kids of adoption are completely helpless in the situation and it's not their fault.  It was then that I knew that that silly little stick that I couldn't forget about was more than a mere idea, but something that embodied the condition in which these children were living in. 

     Unsure of how to even start the story I spoke with my wife and the engines started turning.  The story of Twig was written in less than a day, but I had sat on the idea for 3 years before it was written.  I have since fallen in love with writing and now feel like I have just one more tool to reach people.  I learned that sometimes you don't have to have the best idea in the world.  You just have to have the ability to follow through with what your vision is.  I hope that in doing so myself that someone will find comfort in this simple, but sweet story of a Twig that only wants what we all should never be without, a family.  I also hope that if you're reading this, that you will never short yourself in life because you feel what you are doing is insignificant.  Because everything matters to someone, and I hope just as I have ever so  un-expectantly done, that you find what matters to you.

Thursday, December 19, 2013


         EMOTIONS are probably the most powerful thing that we as humans feel, and WORDS are the most powerful weapon that people have.  As with any weapon though, under the influence of an altered emotional state, it could result in a negative use of the weapon, or words.  If you don't believe the latter then I can prove it.  Next time you see someone try to tick them off.  I assure you this is an effortless task.  If you can change how someone feels, effect the speed of their heart and the way they breath, then you would have to agree that words are powerful.  That is why I love writing so much.

       More often than not I find my foot making home to a mouth that doesn't have an off switch.  I say this because even when my subconscious is subtlety whispering the plentiful do's and do not's, I always ignore my moral compass in the moment.  Spoken words don't have a backspace button.  You can't say something and take it back, even if you really wish you could.  No matter how hard I try, somehow I always find an opportunity to misuse my ability to speak.  Words when spoken have facial gestures and undertones attached that imply a multitude of meanings.  You can never just say what you feel without it being interpreted a different way than intended.  People are always analyzing subtleties in the way you speak and your posture or eye movements. 

        Words when written down though can be taken in a number of ways, and even though they can be misconstrued, I find that if I read something and have a question about it's actual intent, I view it like a painting.  I admire it for what it is, pick out qualities I like and am open to interpretations.  The truth is, most people do not think before they speak, it is far too automatic, but when you write you know you can't let time water down your comments or dilute what you were saying.  When you right you are careful, aware of the finality that words on paper have.  I love to write because of this.  Writing gives people like me a chance to think before speaking, and I think most people could benefit from writing in the same way.

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Finding Myself

           While I have only lived in 2 states very long, and those being the neighboring southern states of South Carolina and Georgia, I have occupied the walls of over forty dwellings that were home to anyone but myself.  Out of place to say the least I have drifted from bad situation to the next, always adapting to a new temporary role, putting on a face that would provide me a warm bed and food.  It was never very long in one spot before my suppressed personality emerged in a fit of rage.  I have been thrown out of almost as many places. 

          I have learned that one of the most difficult things that someone can do is to be someone they are not.  It is through the gift of writing that my life has found meaning, but like anything, you have to put action behind your passion or it doesn't do any good.  I am searching for my place in the world, a home that will not fade, and while I've taken some time to get there, I believe some wonderful things are about to transform.  It's a journey of uncertainty and I would love some company along the way.